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The Baker's Daughter
"A sensitive, multilayered novel, this is a moving examination of the effect...
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Do you have friends or family members with whom you frequently exchange letters, cards, or emails, though you rarely see them in person or talk on the phone?

Created: 09/08/12

Replies: 24

Posted Sep. 08, 2012 Go to Top | Bottom | link | alert
davinamw

Join Date: 10/15/10

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Do you have friends or family members with whom you frequently exchange letters, cards, or emails, though you rarely see them in person or talk on the phone?

The characters use letters as a means of expressing their innermost feelings to each other. Do you have friends or family members with whom you frequently exchange letters, cards, or emails, though you rarely see them in person or talk on the phone? If so, do you find yourself being more or less open in those written communications?


Posted Sep. 08, 2012 Go to Top | Bottom | link | alert
BamaCarol

Join Date: 04/16/12

Posts: 29

RE: Do you have friends or family members with whom you frequently exchange letters, cards, or emails, though you rarely see them in person or talk on the phone?

I do have some family members that I rarely see or talk with. I am not as open with them as with the ones that I see frequently but maybe that is because I know that I could visit with them or talk almost whenever I wanted to. Prior to the advent of so much easy communication, the written word was the only way for some family members and friends to talk with each other and I believe the people were more open then.


Posted Sep. 08, 2012 Go to Top | Bottom | link | alert
rebajane

Join Date: 04/21/11

Posts: 138

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RE: Do you have friends or family members with whom you frequently exchange letters, cards, or emails, though you rarely see them in person or talk on the phone?

My husband and I live on the East coast and his family lives on the West. My oldest son lives in England. Most communication is done through email, much less through snail mail. Facebook has been a godsend for keeping in touch, especially with pictures


Posted Sep. 08, 2012 Go to Top | Bottom | link | alert
irisf

Join Date: 01/16/12

Posts: 63

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RE: Do you have friends or family members with whom you frequently exchange letters, cards, or emails, though you rarely see them in person or talk on the phone?

Sometimes its easier to be more candid with someone who is geographically removed because any personal information shared is of no interest to those around them


Posted Sep. 08, 2012 Go to Top | Bottom | link | alert
alice

Join Date: 03/06/12

Posts: 9

RE: Do you have friends or family members with whom you frequently exchange letters, cards, or emails, though you rarely see them in person or talk on the phone?

With e-mail so much a part of life today, it is easy to stay in touch with people I never would have before. I have an old "friend' from high school who I haven't seen or talked to on the phone for 20 years but at least once a week she forwards me an -e-mail or I send one to her.


Posted Sep. 08, 2012 Go to Top | Bottom | link | alert
debrals

Join Date: 11/28/11

Posts: 21

RE: Do you have friends or family members with whom you frequently exchange letters, cards, or emails, though you rarely see them in person or talk on the phone?

No. These letters were essential for the sisters to exchange feelings about what was going on with them. There was no one else to trust in their situations. It was a true lifeline for both of them!


Posted Sep. 09, 2012 Go to Top | Bottom | link | alert
joanw

Join Date: 04/21/11

Posts: 12

RE: Do you have friends or family members with whom you frequently exchange letters, cards, or emails, though you rarely see them in person or talk on the phone?

I have several friends that I exchange emails with often and rarely see. It helps us all to keep in touch and share our lives with other people and to hear how they are doing as well.


Posted Sep. 09, 2012 Go to Top | Bottom | link | alert
lynnw

Join Date: 09/01/11

Posts: 50

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RE: Do you have friends or family members with whom you frequently exchange letters, cards, or emails, though you rarely see them in person or talk on the phone?

I have several close friends and family members that I rarely see, but we still keep in close touch. In today's world with people living all over the country not to mention the world, if you care about people you have to make that effort. Sometimes I think more comes out when you are writing as opposed to when you are having a conversation.


Posted Sep. 09, 2012 Go to Top | Bottom | link | alert
Lynn R

Join Date: 09/08/12

Posts: 8

RE: Do you have friends or family members with whom you frequently exchange letters, cards, or emails, though you rarely see them in person or talk on the phone?

I don't write any letters except at Christmas time and I do try to write a personal note in every Birthday card I write. I know some people don't care for the "Christmas Letter", but I love when I get one from friends I no longer see on a regular basis and we get to catch up, especially about their children. We watched each others kids grow up and then loose track. It is nice to hear about jobs, children and it is good to know even the bad news.


Posted Sep. 10, 2012 Go to Top | Bottom | link | alert
joyces

Join Date: 06/16/11

Posts: 235

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RE: Do you have friends or family members with whom you frequently exchange letters, cards, or emails, though you rarely see them in person or talk on the phone?

Other than Christmas letters I send very few snail mail communications these days. As stated above the e-mail and Facebook are pretty much my means of keeping in contact with friends and a huge family. Though i very much predate the internet age I do love it and am very grateful that it is available to keep in contact. I am more circumspect in what I share than the younger generations in my family but I certainly enjoy their posts and willingness to share so much.


Posted Sep. 10, 2012 Go to Top | Bottom | link | alert
dorothyt

Join Date: 04/10/11

Posts: 102

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RE: Do you have friends or family members with whom you frequently exchange letters, cards, or emails, though you rarely see them in person or talk on the phone?

I don't correspond with friends and family as much as I should or would like. Facebook is a handy way for quick updates, but it certainly is not the place for meaningful one-on-one heart-to-heart writing.


Posted Sep. 10, 2012 Go to Top | Bottom | link | alert
lisag

Join Date: 01/12/12

Posts: 298

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RE: Do you have friends or family members with whom you frequently exchange letters, cards, or emails, though you rarely see them in person or talk on the phone?

As others have said, I use email, Facebook, etc., to communicate both with people I see on a regular basis (co-workers, etc.) and those I never see (people I graduated from high school with, especially). I tend to be more candid via electronic communication than verbally. I'm a much better writer than speaker and it's easier for me to share more in writing than speaking. I may be in the minority in life.


Posted Sep. 11, 2012 Go to Top | Bottom | link | alert
malindan

Join Date: 05/10/12

Posts: 36

RE: Do you have friends or family members with whom you frequently exchange letters, cards, or emails, though you rarely see them in person or talk on the phone?

I have moved around quite a bit so I do keep in contact with many people via FB and also email. I also hold to tradition and send yearly xmas cards out to old friends and neighbors, many of whom I probably won't see again in person. The biggest draw of the 30 years plus crowd to Facebook was the chance to reconnect with people from your past. All communication is important even if you are not in the same room.


Posted Sep. 14, 2012 Go to Top | Bottom | link | alert
Peggy H

Join Date: 06/13/11

Posts: 38

RE: Do you have friends or family members with whom you frequently exchange letters, cards, or emails, though you rarely see them in person or talk on the phone?

Yes both family and friends. I speak with a childhood friend every few months but we see each other once a year. This is an important connection as I email and speak to a brother but we see each other seldom and I find this hard. What would have happened to Hazel if she could have had her family support? It took Deedie and Reba seeing and talking to each other to understand the past.

Pegh


Pegh
Posted Sep. 16, 2012 Go to Top | Bottom | link | alert
harriettek

Join Date: 10/19/10

Posts: 27

RE: Do you have friends or family members with whom you frequently exchange letters, cards, or emails, though you rarely see them in person or talk on the phone?

As it happens, I have reconnected with a cousin in England. A sister & a brother both settled there when the rest of the family came to the U.S. We have been passing old pics back and forth by internet and have been visiting, catching up on family history, etc. It keeps our past in the present.


Posted Sep. 17, 2012 Go to Top | Bottom | link | alert
lisag

Join Date: 01/12/12

Posts: 298

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RE: Do you have friends or family members with whom you frequently exchange letters, cards, or emails, though you rarely see them in person or talk on the phone?

Another side of the coin, there are people I've met online - in book groups - whom I've gone on to meet in person. I even hosted a friend from Ireland when she came to visit the U.S. We'd "known" each other for years so I felt comfortable having her in my house. There have been others, as well, whom I met but they didn't stay with me. And we still communicate via email, which is a great thing.

Imagine if there had been an internet during WWII. There would have been videos uploaded to YouTube, people communicating with the outside world via Twitter, Facebook, etc. We saw all that with the Iraq war. I have to wonder if such instant communication would have shortened that war, as people saw the atrocities firsthand? Interesting to contemplate.


Posted Sep. 17, 2012 Go to Top | Bottom | link | alert
kathleend

Join Date: 09/13/12

Posts: 4

RE: Do you have friends or family members with whom you frequently exchange letters, cards, or emails, though you rarely see them in person or talk on the phone?

When reading the novel, I thought a lot about the time it took Elsie & Hazel to exchange letters and how much easier it would have been with e-mail. I do use e-mail with family and friends (especially since many live on the west coast and I live in the east). But I write a lot of notes and cards because I feel it is far more personal and I can express myself the way I want. For example, I love writing a note with a fountain pen---never a ballpoint! And it is such a welcome surprise to get a handwritten note in the mail!


Posted Sep. 18, 2012 Go to Top | Bottom | link | alert
bettyt

Join Date: 05/12/11

Posts: 121

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RE: Do you have friends or family members with whom you frequently exchange letters, cards, or emails, though you rarely see them in person or talk on the phone?

Since most of my life I have moved from place to place working with the military/federal government, letters were essential to staying in contact with friends and family. The last 16 years that I worked I was in the Middle East a lot and email was a great way to stay in touch. I am not all that open in emails -- they are just too impersonal. But in letters I am very often more open than I am face-to-face. I tend to be more a listener than a talker. I do not interrupt much since that is rude. That has always served well in my work. However, it is somewhat of a negative in my personal life. I find that I am surrounded by people who do pretty much all the talking. Then when I do try to say something they are quick to interrupt and start on themselves again. Letters have always allowed that ability to say what I needed to say and have -- yes, force -- the other person to take turns "listening". It isn't all one-sided since I ask about the recipient's life -- often specific questions, so it's not just the shallow "what's up in your life" routine. I may not see someone for years but then when I do see them it feels like it was only yesterday that we were together because our letters maintained that bond.


Posted Sep. 21, 2012 Go to Top | Bottom | link | alert
barbarab

Join Date: 04/15/11

Posts: 29

RE: Do you have friends or family members with whom you frequently exchange letters, cards, or emails, though you rarely see them in person or talk on the phone?

Yes, I do. One of my dearest friends is in the Midwest while I am in So. Cal. I see her only when I go to visit back home & love talking with her face to face. I have difficulty being on the phone with her because she can talk for 2 hours on the phone & I am not a phone person. A lot of our communication is done by email & cards.
When I was in elementary school I had 3 penpals from different parts of the world & it was great. I wonder if that is still done, anyone know?
I think Lillian felt such a close connection to Elsie because she was her mother's sister. It didn't matter that they had not met until Mutti's death.


Posted Sep. 23, 2012 Go to Top | Bottom | link | alert
marganna

Join Date: 10/14/11

Posts: 23

RE: Do you have friends or family members with whom you frequently exchange letters, cards, or emails, though you rarely see them in person or talk on the phone?

Email, the phone, Christmas Letters, texting, Facebook, sometimes a personal handwritten snail mail letter/card -- I try really hard to keep up with friends and family. It's really important to me & I love books that use this method to develop the story line.


Posted Sep. 24, 2012 Go to Top | Bottom | link | alert
rebajane

Join Date: 04/21/11

Posts: 138

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RE: Do you have friends or family members with whom you frequently exchange letters, cards, or emails, though you rarely see them in person or talk on the phone?

Its really kind of sad that writing letters is a lost art. I have letters written to me by my mom years ago that I read occasionally know that she has passed. We lose that with email


Posted Sep. 26, 2012 Go to Top | Bottom | link | alert
bettyt

Join Date: 05/12/11

Posts: 121

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RE: Do you have friends or family members with whom you frequently exchange letters, cards, or emails, though you rarely see them in person or talk on the phone?

In response to barbarab, I use to write to penpals via snailmail and was fortunate enough to meet several of them. I still maintain a correspondence with a few of them to this day. This is really a lost art! And to rebajane, I have some of my mother's letters and letters from friends that have since died. Those letters are very dear to me. And remember the little "tuck-in's" -- cartoons, a poem, a teabag, some little extra to brighten the recipient's day?


Posted Oct. 16, 2012 Go to Top | Bottom | link | alert
lisag

Join Date: 01/12/12

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RE: Do you have friends or family members with whom you frequently exchange letters, cards, or emails, though you rarely see them in person or talk on the phone?

I'm curious to know if anyone here still handwrites notes at the holidays? I did until just a few years ago, before I found handwriting an arduous task. It really makes my hand get sore to write very much. I miss snail mail, though and don't care for the professionally made cards with signatures printed on them. They lack all the warmth cards are supposed to have. If I started a handwritten letter movement do you think I'd get anywhere? Doubt it.


Posted Oct. 16, 2012 Go to Top | Bottom | link | alert
davinamw

Join Date: 10/15/10

Posts: 549

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RE: Do you have friends or family members with whom you frequently exchange letters, cards, or emails, though you rarely see them in person or talk on the phone?

Hi Lisa,

I don't think I've ever come across a card with a preprinted signature!

I hand write fairly long notes inside cards and I always hand write letters when writing to express my condolences on a death. I also hand-write replies to those who write to me by hand - including various elderly relatives and friends; but I have to admit that I type out what I want to say first and then write it out, as I find that I've lost the ability to think and hand-write at the same time. Or perhaps more accurately is that I've got used to the ability to edit my typing and thus get frustrated if I hand-write something that doesn't sound quite as I wanted and thus either have to live with it or start again.

I also find that my writing has deteriorated considerably but improves with a fountain pen - so that is what I use these days.

I've never yet sent an electronic greeting but find myself increasingly tempted to do so, especially when sending cards to our many family and friends in the UK (where I lived until I was 30) - not to save time but because it is so costly to send a physical card and while that might be something that I want to do, I find myself increasingly reluctant to put the recipient in the position of feeling the need to send one back!


Posted Oct. 22, 2012 Go to Top | Bottom | link | alert
lisag

Join Date: 01/12/12

Posts: 298

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RE: Do you have friends or family members with whom you frequently exchange letters, cards, or emails, though you rarely see them in person or talk on the phone?

Davina,

You have to order the cards with the printed signature - I didn't phrase that well!

I love fountain pens as well. I used to buy disposable ones at Borders, before its demise, which were okay as far as not leaving too many blots. I like the scratching sound but my daughter complained it sounded awful... Sigh.

I'm not sure if it's laziness or just lack of ambition (is there a difference?!) but I would give up sending holiday cards if I could get away with it. I think it's laziness, come to think of it!

Lisa


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