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The Secret Keeper
"An intriguing mystery, shifting between past and present." - People, 4 stars
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Trauma in Vivian's life definitely left a mark. Do you believe someone that young can recover?

Created: 07/15/13

Replies: 11

Posted Jul. 15, 2013 Go to Top | Bottom | link | alert
bjm

Join Date: 10/19/12

Posts: 22

Vivien

Trauma in Vivien's life definitely left a mark. Do you believe someone that young can recover?


Posted Jul. 15, 2013 Go to Top | Bottom | link | alert
kimk

Join Date: 10/16/10

Posts: 123

Expert

RE: Trauma in Vivien's life definitely left a mark. Do you believe someone that young can recover?

I think recovery would be more possible now than it was then. Now there's no shame about going to a psychologist, and it's a well-established, well-respected course of treatment. I doubt that was the case when Vivien was a child. Not to mention the whole "stiff-upper-lip" attitude that would have prevented her from even asking for help.


Posted Jul. 15, 2013 Go to Top | Bottom | link | alert
jeannew

Join Date: 04/23/11

Posts: 26

RE: Trauma in Vivien's life definitely left a mark. Do you believe someone that young can recover?

I think we're so much better now at recognizing and dealing with grief and trauma. It did used to be handled with that whole "stiff upper lip." That was convenient for others who didn't want to deal with the messiness of grief, but it did nothing to help the traumatized, especially children, deal with their traumas. That said, I don't know that you can ever recover from the kind of trauma that both Vivien and Dolly experienced; I think it will always leave a mark. It's how it's handled that determines whether the victim becomes a fully-functioning member of society.


Posted Jul. 15, 2013 Go to Top | Bottom | link | alert
lindav

Join Date: 04/23/11

Posts: 6

RE: Trauma in Vivien's life definitely left a mark. Do you believe someone that young can recover?

I don't believe that anyone can completely recover after losing her whole family in one afternoon, and then being shipped to England all in a few months. I think she was very courageous being so young and vitually all alone except for the chaperone on the ship. And once you thought her life was turning over when she married
Henry Jenkins-but he was so violent she must have felt so vulnerable and alone. I was happy to realize at the end of the book that she did have a wonderful family and husband.


Posted Jul. 17, 2013 Go to Top | Bottom | link | alert
Navy Mom

Join Date: 04/12/12

Posts: 93

Expert

RE: Trauma in Vivien's life definitely left a mark. Do you believe someone that young can recover?

I have read many real accounts of people who have had very traumatic experiences who persevere and become loving and prosperous people. The past is never gone but they move on from it. It shows the resilience of the human spirit. I know there are some who never get past it, but I think those people are the exception, not the rule.


Posted Jul. 17, 2013 Go to Top | Bottom | link | alert
mariannes

Join Date: 12/17/12

Posts: 134

Expert

RE: Trauma in Vivien's life definitely left a mark. Do you believe someone that young can recover?

I've never experienced anything remotely like what the characters faced, so I really can only guess from people I've seen. It seems to me that it's hard for people to recover from trauma. Many people seem to work through it, but I think scars are still there, especially if the person feels some guilt about what happened. I'm sure a good counselor can help, but not everybody gets that. I'm thinking about abused children who blame themselves and don't tell anyone what happened.


Posted Jul. 17, 2013 Go to Top | Bottom | link | alert
bettyt

Join Date: 05/12/11

Posts: 116

Expert

RE: Trauma in Vivien's life definitely left a mark. Do you believe someone that young can recover?

I agree with Navy Mom -- while the trauma is very difficult for any young person, there are some who never recover and some who have the inner strength to work through it.


Posted Jul. 17, 2013 Go to Top | Bottom | link | alert
sallyh

Join Date: 09/07/12

Posts: 56

Expert

RE: Trauma in Vivien's life definitely left a mark. Do you believe someone that young can recover?

Recovery from trauma is possible, but severe emotional trauma leaves permanent scars on the psyche just as severe physical trauma leaves scars on the body. Survivors learn to live with and work around the scars.


Posted Jul. 22, 2013 Go to Top | Bottom | link | alert
tracyb

Join Date: 09/22/11

Posts: 22

RE: Trauma in Vivian's life definitely left a mark. Do you believe someone that young can recover?

If a child has a caring person to guide them through a traumatic experience there is hope. Had Katy Ellis been able to stay with Vivian I think her life may have been different.

Agree with above answers, why some make it some don't may be studied for years to come.


Posted Jul. 23, 2013 Go to Top | Bottom | link | alert
christinep

Join Date: 07/16/13

Posts: 26

RE: Trauma in Vivian's life definitely left a mark. Do you believe someone that young can recover?

So in asking this question, do you think that Vivien did not have a good life? I think by looking at Vivien's life, you see that she was able to overcome her childhood trauma thanks to people like Katy Ellis, Jimmy and the husband she had her children with. She got a new beginning and when it was threatened, she did what she had to protect herself and her family. It makes me believe she was a strong person. So yes, I do think someone can recover from childhood trauma.


Posted Jul. 23, 2013 Go to Top | Bottom | link | alert
joanp

Join Date: 06/13/11

Posts: 35

RE: Trauma in Vivian's life definitely left a mark. Do you believe someone that young can recover?

It depends on the person and the foundation built before the tragedy. Vivien came from a loving close family and rebuilt what she had lost. Of course, I didn't realize that until the true story came out.


Posted Jul. 25, 2013 Go to Top | Bottom | link | alert
jeanniet

Join Date: 06/20/13

Posts: 10

RE: Trauma in Vivian's life definitely left a mark. Do you believe someone that young can recover?

I think it is the trauma that shapes who we are. We learn to move on. It becomes who we are. Vivien did a great job about moving on, creating a new life for herself and her family didn't suffer because of her past. I wish more people would try to be that courageous and not turn to drugs/alcohol/ other harmful coping skills.


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