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and Other Uncommon Tales of Golf
by Gregory G. Barton
"Hey, Pumpkin, lunch ready yet?" The smile quickly turned to a frown
when he saw me standing behind her. "Who's he?" the farmer inquired
with a nod of his head.
"This is Adam, Pa," Mary Ellen said, running a hand along a gleaming
fender. "Says he wants to marry me."
Her father raised an eyebrow and stared at his daughter, who calmly returned his
gaze. He wiped his hands with a filthy rag and began to slowly circle me.
"Where you from, son?"
"San Francisco originally, but I live in Omaha now."
"And what makes you think you want to marry my daughter all of a
sudden?"
"Well, I saw her practicing just now, you see...over at the
pond...and¼" I trailed off weakly, realizing how absurd it sounded. But
the explanation must have satisfied the farmer, for he nodded and stopped
directly in front of me, towering over my head.
"You play the game much?"
"Game?" I asked in puzzlement. "I don't understand. What
game?"
"Golf!" the big man answered as if it was the most obvious thing in
the world.
"Well...yeah," I stammered, "whenever I get the chance."
"Good, 'cause if you want my daughter's hand you'll have to play for
it."
"Play? Play who?" I asked, eyeing the man's big hands with dismay.
"Me," Mary Ellen said with a wry smile.
"You?"
"That's right," Mr. Parker said. "If you can whip her, you can
marry her."
Copyright Gregory G Barton 2001. All rights reserved.
If passion drives you, let reason hold the reins
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