(If you're in a relationship) How does your temperament compare to that of your partner? How do you handle areas where you’re not compatible?
Join Date: 10/11/10
Join Date: 09/07/12
My husband is an extrovert, but although he is much more comfortable with strangers and large groups than I am, and can talk the arm off a chair, he also enjoys socializing in small groups and likes to stay at home, just us and our dogs. I now wonder whether his extroversion has been tempered by my introversion, or if he's just comfortable anywhere. He was never like Greg in the book (insisting on getting together with lots of people every week), which is certainly fortunate for me.
Join Date: 04/16/12
My husband is also an introvert. Over the years we have both realized that we do not like large groups. As a matter of fact, we recently went to a large 40-year reunion. We walked up to the party and watched people for around 5 minutes and then he said he was ready to go. Neither of us wanted to be in that kind of loud social situation - we would much rather be home with our cat and our hobbies and each other. We do like to get out with friends on occasion but it is more than likely going to be another couple or possibly 2 other couples at the most. I am glad that we both have the same kind of temperament and enjoy the same type of environment.
Join Date: 05/09/12
My husband and I have now been married forever so we have adjusted very well to each other. We like quiet evenings and weekends, and we tend to entertain small groups rather than larger groups. I don't watch much television, but he enjoys televised sports and is an avid channel-surfer (channel-surfing drives me batty). When the television comes on I grab a book or e-reader and head for the study. Peace and happiness for both of us.
Join Date: 03/22/12
Join Date: 07/28/11
Join Date: 09/17/11
Join Date: 02/16/12
Join Date: 05/19/11
When I first met my husband back in college he seemed like an extrovert to me. He always had this need to be with other people and had trouble being alone and entertaining himself. After 23 years of marriage he seems like he is much more introverted like me. We now enjoy being with just one another or in small group settings. Maybe he was always an introvert, but felt like he had to socialize to fit in when younger.
Join Date: 03/07/13
Join Date: 04/23/11
We are both introverts but he is more outgoing than I am and enjoys a big party where I do not. We struggled with this for years before realizing what the problem was. I like getting together with small groups of people but not large groups where I don't know anybody. Recently, for example, he had a reunion of former Air Force buddies who used to work at the same place; exactly the kind of situation I always felt forced to attend. Now I'll stay home and he'll go and we're both happy.
Join Date: 04/17/11
We are both introverts so it works out well- I will make the effort to socialize with other people more but once in the situation he is more comfortable with small talk interaction. We would both rather stay in or go out with just one other couple.
Join Date: 10/21/10
My former partner and I were opposites. Nothing could make him believe I needed time alone...lots of it. Also reading books was a necessity. Sadly my mother harassed me even when I was young about reading too much and not going out side to "play". Finally, after I started school I could walk the 5 blocks to the library (it was next to the school) where I spent most of my summers reading and being by myself. (Even tho we had a TV) After I had read all the kids books in the library an understanding teacher actually signed a permission slip that I could take out any book in the library. Sadly the marriage ended I have since been living under my beautiful "rock" and only coming out as needed. Until I read QUIET I had no idea why I am like I am.
Join Date: 01/12/12
My husband is less introverted than I am but he's still somewhat an introvert. He's able to put himself "out there" partly because he's a manager now, working himself up to being more and more extroverted. He also made friends with very extroverted people way back when he first started working. I think that had a large impact on him. I think we're fairly compatible in this sense, especially since I took a job that required me to be more social and have learned a bit about pushing myself out of my comfort zone. I'd still rather be home, though, either with a book, watching a movie, etc. In some ways I believe we balance each other out, though, like pennyn, my husband doesn't completely understand my need for LOTS of solitude.
Join Date: 01/18/13
I am not in a relationship, but as soon as I read the chapter on this topic, I immediately called my mom and told her she had to jump ahead in the book and read it! (I liked the book so much after the first 3 chapters, I made my mom go out and get a copy - she couldn't wait for me to finish.)
My parents are complete opposites. My mom is an introvert and my dad, an extrovert. He really doesn't understand where my mom and I are coming from a lot of the time. My dad is a social animal and loves to entertain and have friends/family over for dinner. My mom dreads planning and worries constantly about how things will turn out. She also would rather stay home, than go out.
Join Date: 01/23/13
I'm smiling as I read these comments, noting the posts are overwhelmingly from introverts. As a respondent group, what else would we expect from a group of devoted READERS? I've been married to an *extrovert* for 43 years. Our son is more introverted than I am, while our two daughters are probably ambiverts. We have many different currents in our family river. Usually, we ebb and flow pretty smoothly with one another, but sometimes the water gets choppy. As a consequence of reading this book, I have a few new tools when our family dynamic gets rough.
Join Date: 03/04/13
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