Brid realizes that most girls their age are like Ina, and that she, Brid, is the outlier. "I felt then that I was not a real girl." What do you suppose she means by this? Can you relate?

Brid observes her sister's beauty and lack of interest in political affairs. She realizes most girls their age are like Ina, and that she, Brid, is the outlier. "I felt then that I was not a real girl. I was an imposter, plucking my eyebrows to look like them." What do you suppose she means by this? Can you relate to the statement?

As a teenager and even now, I am more interested in talking with men than women. I have never worn make-up other than a touch of lipstick, but I never felt that I was not a girl. Without make-up and interested in sports and politics, I still fell in love and became happily married. Perhaps if Brid had had a healthier loving relationship with her mother, she would not have felt so different.

P.S. Other participants have made an excellent point. Her mother groomed her to be the "soldier" of the family so she tried to follow that path to win her mother's approval.

Also I agree with someone else who said that Brid the daughter did not seem to be the same character as Brid the mother.

I think this ties back to the theme of the book as to how they were influenced by the overall troubles in Ireland. Brid is conditioned by her mother that life cannot be enjoyed or lived until Ireland is reunited and the British are expelled. Nothing else matters.

Ina was able to be happy and live in the moment. Her life was not overshadowed by the IRA and her responsibility to help with the conflict. I felt that from the start Brid was forcedly her mother into helping, it warted with supplying glass bottles and it ended in her leaving her homeland because of her role in the bombing and the guilt she carried.

Brid was in a sense groomed by her mother. She was designated to be the soldier in the family and as such was dissuaded from doing girlish things. Living in the moment was not a choice offered to her and it never entered her mind that she could choose controlled her destiny.

Brid was the daughter chosen by her mother to fight for the cause. Her mother’s bitterness and anger needed an outlet. Brid was the chosen rebel. Ina was allowed a more typical teenage life. I was a teenager during the Vietnam war. Looking back I was somewhat oblivious to what was happening during that conflict which I think is more typical of a teenager.

Brid’s lack of belonging is a common teenage issue, whether it focuses on political issues or being part of the right crowd. Brid’s mother encouraged and groomed her to be a revolutionary without having the courage to be one herself. This ’grooming’ behavior is why women and children cannot be trusted or released during wartime activities like Hamas/Israel. The children will not be neutral because their mothers are not (nor should they be).

Brid was raised to live and act in ways that were more adult than childish. She wasn't allowed to interact with her peers, other girls or boys, in the ways that her sister was allowed. I think her statement "I felt then that I was not a real girl." expresses her alienation from society's norm. I didn't feel it meant that she didn't feel feminine as much as it was a statement about how she simply didn't fit in any of her peer age groups. She didn't know or understand the "rules" of behavior for a girl her age. Sad, really.

Oh, I totally get that. When I was growing up I felt it was important to be a girly-girl - lots of makeup, cute clothes, focus on being petite and likeable. As I became an adult and developed my own persona, I abandoned all that. Out here in the Pacific Northwest I feel totally comfortable, but when I return to my Midwest home for a visit I definitely feel... out of place...ugly...underdressed/undermakeuped?

They had very distinct personalities and their mother chose early on who would be the serious, politically involved one. Brid wanted to please her mother’s in spite of her confusion and conflicted feelings about it.

Ina was able to live a more carefree life and have fun like a lot of teenagers do, Brid was bound to her mothers expectations of her and felt a lot of responsibility to her and the "cause". Some of it was just based on personalities, but part of it was due to her mothers expectations of her. I don't think Aoife was very fair in the weight of things she put on Brid.