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There are currently 30 member reviews
for The Sound of Gravel
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Gwen C. (Clearfield, PA)
The Sound of Gravel
The Sound of Gravel grabs your attention, yanks you into the world of polygamy as seen through a child's eyes, and never lets go. This memoir assails your senses and recreates through sounds, smells, and unflinching sights an unimaginable childhood. One thinks, "It can't get any worse," and then it does. The family photos remind you this story really happened. Riveting throughout, I highly recommend this book. I see many avenues for discussion for a book club.
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Becky H. (Chicago, IL)
The Sound of Grave by Ruth Wariner
What a sad – and horrifying – life these children had foisted upon them by adults who should have cared for and loved them. It is hard to know where to start – with the father who wouldn't give his children his name, a mother so blinded by faith she puts her children in mortal danger, a community that lives in abject poverty out of fear? – faith? – stupidity? It also shows the inadequacy of border patrols, government assistance, the safety net for children and women and on and on.
Ruth Wariner's calm retelling of her childhood living in a cult was difficult to read. The life of this family caught in the blindness of the mother to the toxic and heartbreaking reality of her family's desperation and danger is written in straightforward prose. Ruth's ability to ultimately save the remaining children is testament to her strength of character.
I can't say that I "enjoyed" this book, but it was certainly riveting reading. I was a bit disappointed that I didn't learn more about fundamental LDS, but then that was not the point of the book.
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Anne C. (Herndon, VA)
Amazing Story of Survival!
This beautifully written memoir by a woman born into a polygamist Mormon cult is touching, tragic, and ultimately triumphant. Ruth describes her life, beginning at age 5, when she lives in abject poverty in Mexico as a member of a small rural town founded as a fundamentalist Mormon colony, where the purpose of life is to have as many wives and children as possible. Women are considered to be nothing more than baby-making machines, and children are valued by quantity, rather than as individuals. As a consequence, Ruth and her many siblings, including three born with severe mental retardation, are cared for by a loving but ignorant mother who relies on welfare checks from the U.S. government to supplement the meager resources provided by her abusive husband. In spite of living in a mouse-infested shack with no running water, no electricity, and very little food, the children love their mother and each other and are often happy with the little they have.
As I read this amazing story, I realized that Ruth and her brothers and sisters were born at about the same time as my three children. What a difference between our comfortable middle-class home and the life Ruth lived! My heart ached for the deprivations the children in this family suffered and the hazards all around them. No child should have to live like this! Worst of all was the perverted religion that dictated how they should live and that this life style was somehow holy.
After many terrible events and tragedies in her life, Ruth realizes that the life she was born into is evil and based on lies. She is finally able to escape with some of her siblings and make a new life for them in the United States. It is truly wonderful to read how she triumphed over such overwhelming odds to become a teacher and a writer. Her determination to take care of what remained of her family is amazing and inspiring!
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Paula Jacunski
Engrossing and Disturbing
Well written, stark description of the author's life growing up in a polygamy community. I did have to put it down for a few days in the middle of the book as it was indeed disturbing and very sad to think children can be raised this way. The author had done enough foreshadowing that I was distressed thinking about what was likely to happen. I expect I will be thinking about this book for a long time. A few quibbles: the book title doesn't fit for me. It reminds me of Lucinda Williams' song "Car Wheels on a gravel road" with the same sort of feeling, but the author mostly describes the sound of boot steps on the floor as being ominous for her, at least that's what I remember. And I was surprised that Matt (spoiler alert!) told his wife there would be a 50/50 chance of him taking a second wife...I would have liked to known more about what he was thinking, and I don't think his character as written led me to think that was even an option he would think about. All in all, a tremendous and brave book.
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Bobbie D. (Boca Raton, FL)
The Sound of Gravel
Sad, almost unbelievable true story of a girl raised in a polygamist community in northern Mexico.
Everything is done in the name of God!
"Ruthie", the storyteller, of this memoir, lives for most of her young years in a hovel without running water or electricity and not even a lock on the door.
She becomes a second mother to her always increasing brothers and sisters, some of whom have severe disabilities. How she survives her abusive stepfather and harsh life is her story. And it is a compelling one. Found it hard to put the book down.
Should appeal to just about everyone.
So glad there is an epilogue to the story!
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Jill F. (Blackwood, NJ)
I could not put this book down!
If it's true that "what doesn't kill us makes us stronger," the kids in this family must be a mix between Superman and the Hulk.
Without an adult in their lives who was able to protect them, they were forced to take on that role for themselves and one another.
The resilience of the author in particular amazes me!
I highly recommend this book but only if you're prepared to disappear for a while. I didn't want to go to work, sleep, church or anywhere else until the book was finished.
Kudos to the author for a life well-lived, and a book well-written.
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Lynne B. (Exeter, NH)
Truth is Stranger Than Fiction
Truth is stranger than fiction in the story of Ruth Wariner. You can't help but be caught up in this very emotional account of the life of a young girl growing up as part of a polygamist doomsday cult. The ups and downs of the life of Ruth, her mother and siblings will bring you to both tears and anger.
This lifestyle has been written about in numerous memoirs but told through the innocent eyes of young Ruthie as she begins to become aware of how limiting the lifestyle is and how trapped she finds herself, is a fresh look at the despair of this type of mind control and its effects on a family of innocents. Not only does Ruth face the strong effects of this strange faith but has to endure domestic and sexual abuse as well as dealing with the handicaps of several siblings. She is forced to grow up way too soon and yet finds a way out to become a successful woman and writer.
I highly recommend this poignant and well written account that provides one with an eye opening look at how a good mother can fall prey to this type of mind control disguised as a religious faith and endanger her entire family's health and well-being.
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