What factors do you think contribute to why we perceive violence differently depending on who is committing the act?

While we see several female characters choose violence, we also see a number of male characters choose (or threaten) the same—Samir, Ramesh, and Bada-Bhai, especially. What difference do you feel it makes, if any, when violence is being perpetrated by male characters versus female characters? What factors do you think contribute to why we perceive violence differently depending on who is committing the act?

Maybe the dual perception is not so much due to who, but why? The men commit their offensive acts as bullies to promote their place in society, to secure their lazy lifestyle at the expense of the family unit. This is dishonorable and shows no good character qualities. While the women are practically forced to take defensive actions to save themselves and in some cases their children from this violence. The women are now forced to become the protectors and bread winners and role models for the children. With that protector role now reversed, her violence is necessary, perhaps even forgivable.

Whether fair or not, men are often seen as more violent in nature therefore their committing violence may be more accepted or expected. If violence us perpetrated against the innocent it's absolutely unacceptable. If violence begets violence, we raise our hands and think "what did you expect"

It’s the actions for me theire were both male and females acting without honor, so when Farah threatens Geeta I had no empathy for her meanness. Same with most if the men, their actions were cruel and unforgivable

The women committing violence are victims seeking revenge. They seem justified

It depends on who is the bully. Sometimes women are the bullies and justice is sought against them, in this book, the bullies were mostly the men, taking advantage of their “superior”role in society and likely their size. (A commonality amongst many cultures, for sure)

I think in this question choice or intent is critical. Violence was perpetrated on the women not by their choice but by the need for power and control of the men. The women responded with self defense or protection which had the consequence of death. Saloni's relationship with her husband acted as a baseline for what a relationship could and should be like.

We perceive violence differently depending on who is committing the act based on the power the person has. Violence committed by people with physical power is perceived more negatively when people with less physical power are victims.

Ingrained bias dictates how we view an act of violence. The bias can be along race, religion, ethnicity, gender, socioeconomic, geographical, etc. lines. In addition, it is very hard for humans to admit that they might have been wrong in their admiration of an individual or concept.

It makes a difference if the act of violence is voluntary or in response to an act of violence. Violence perpetrated for control is not the same as violence for self preservation. Domestic violence is not always engaged by the male - in this story it was - but in society it is just as likely that the first violence is done by a woman. It is simply a method of control - unjustly used against another. Partner against partner it is domestic violence - adult to child it is known as child abuse - man to man it is usually known as battery. None of it should be tolerated and personally any of those three types of violence are the same for me - horrendous and culpable.