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Inside the Afghan Women's Resistance
by Cheryl Benard
These women had a different view. To them, martyrdom was not heroic and the
sacrifice of children was not gladly given. They wanted their young sons alive
and accused the rebel leaders of being tyrants, unscrupulous and corrupt. I had
been led to believe that Afghan women had no views or, if they did, that they
followed those of their men exactly. This was my first indication that such was
not the case.
I met women who were not ill at all, not the least little bit; having been
widowed or rejected by an angry husband, they just had nowhere else to go, and
the doctor was allowing them this bed as their only refuge. I met women who
needed physical therapy because they had been confined to dark tents for so long
that their bones and muscles and skin had been damaged. Convicts get an hour in
the prison yard, to exercise see the light of day; I met women who had not been
allowed out of their tents for years, except under cover of darkness. I met
women who had been forcibly married, women who had been arbitrarily divorced,
women whose sons had been turned into child soldiers and their daughters into
child brides through the whim of their husbands, women who were crippled because
after a severe beating medical treatment had been withheld. Some had been made
apathetic by despair, but not one of them welcomed her abuse as being in line
with her religion or her culture, and several of them were very angry. You could
go to a conference on women in Islam in Washington, D.C., or Berlin or Los
Angeles and hear Muslim women militantly defend all sorts of inequities on the
grounds that the Prophet or their national tradition or the Quran wanted it so,
but you didn't hear anything like that in this ward. This was more like Gulag
Archipelago, like visiting the political prisoners of a merciless military
dictatorship. It was one thing to realize abstractly that these women's lives
were sad, telling myself that they weren't really like me and didn't expect
anything different and therefore didn't really mind. It was another to come
face-to-face with an entire roomful of their helpless, hopeless misery. And if
these thirty women minded, perhaps they all did.
These women were not resigned, they hadn't grown indifferent to the deaths of
their children, they didn't accept loveless arranged marriages as a given,
they didn't feel secure in the arms of an extended family, they weren't
content in deep traditionalism. It was obvious that I had fallen prey to a
comfortable deception. "These are the lucky ones," the doctor remarked. "Their families are modern enough to allow them medical treatment.
Have you heard the Afghan saying? A woman should only leave her house twice:
once at her wedding, to go to the household of her husband, and once when she
dies, to be taken to the graveyard."
This new and awful knowledge left me with nowhere to go, with no discernible
assignment. The international organizations were not going to rock the boat just
for the sake of Afghan women. They had no champion, and they themselves were in
no position to fight. Was the doctor's approach the best one could hope for?
Did we need to mobilize the pharmaceutical companies and organize a giant
shipment of Xanax to be dropped over Afghanistan like food packets, to
anesthetize Afghan women to their lot?
"There's this school . . . ," a young Afghan woman whispered to me
timidly, having heard from the doctor that these matters were of interest to me.
Another scooter taxi, this time into a lower-middle-class residential area. A
glance to the right and to the left, then a quick dash inside. No, it wasn't
illegal here in Pakistan, but still, a girls' schoolthat was a very
controversial thing, and it was better not to attract notice. I found myself
inside a normal home. In the shaded courtyard, surrounded by plants and vines,
twenty girls sat in rows, their eyes bright and lively and darkened with kohl,
their books open before them. A motherly, businesslike teacher turned to greet
me.
Excerpted from Veiled Courage by Cheryl Benard Copyright 2002 by Cheryl Benard. Excerpted by permission of Broadway, a division of Random House, Inc. All rights reserved. No part of this excerpt may be reproduced or reprinted without permission in writing from the publisher.
In youth we run into difficulties. In old age difficulties run into us
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