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I've shifted the boulder a fraction of an inch, and it's settled onto my
wrist a bit more. This thing weighs a lot more than I do -- it's a testament to
how amped I am that I moved it at all -- and now all I want is to move it back.
I get into position again, pulling with my left hand on top of the stone, and
budge the rock back ever so slightly, reversing what I just did. The pain eases
a little. In the process, I've lacerated and bruised the skin over my left
quadriceps above the knee. I'm sweating hard. With my left hand, I lift my right
shirtsleeve off my shoulder and wipe my forehead. My chest heaves. I need a
drink, but when I suck on my hydration-system hose, I find my water reservoir is
empty.
I have a liter of water in a Lexan bottle in my backpack, but it takes me a
few seconds to realize I won't be able to sling my pack off my right arm. I
remove my camera from my neck and put it on the boulder. Once I have my left arm
free of the pack strap, I expand the right strap, tuck my head inside the loop,
and pull the strap over my left shoulder so it encompasses my torso. The weight
of the rappelling equipment, video camera, and water bottle tugs the pack down
to my feet, and then I step out of the strap loop. Extracting the dark gray
water bottle from the bottom of my pack, I unscrew the top, and before I realize
the significance of what I'm doing, I gulp three large mouthfuls of water and
halt to pant for breath. Then it hits me: In five seconds, I've guzzled a third
of my entire remaining water supply.
"Oh, damn, dude, cap that and put it away. No more water." I screw
down the lid tight, drop the bottle into the pack resting at my knees, and take
three deep breaths.
"OK, time to relax. The adrenaline's not going to get you out of here.
Let's look this over, see what we got." Amazingly, it's been half an hour
since the accident. The decision to get objective with my situation and stop
rushing from one brutish attempt to the next allows my energy to settle down.
This isn't going to be over quickly, so I need to start thinking. To do that, I
need to be calm.
The first thing I decide to do is examine the area where the boulder has my
wrist pinned. Gravity and friction have wedged the chockstone, now suspended
about four feet above the canyon floor, into a new set of constriction points.
At three spots, the opposing walls secure the rock. On the downcanyon side of
the boulder, my hand and wrist form a fourth support where they are caught in
the grip of this horrific handshake. I think, "My hand isn't just stuck in
there, it's actually holding this boulder off the wall. Oh, man, I'm
fucked."
I reach my left fingers down to my right hand where it is visible along the
north wall of the canyon. Poking down into the small gap above the catch point,
I touch my thumb, which is already a sickly gray color. It's cocked sideways in
the space and looks terribly unnatural. I straighten my thumb with the fore and
middle fingers of my left hand. There is no feeling in any part of my right hand
at all. I accept this with a sense of detachment, as if I'm diagnosing someone
else's problem. This clinical objectivity calms me. Without sensation, it
doesn't seem as much my hand -- if it were my hand, I could feel it when I
touched it. The farthest part of my arm I can feel is my wrist, where the
boulder is pinning it. Judging by appearances, the lack of any bone-splitting
noises during the accident, and how it all feels to my left hand, I probably
don't have any broken bones. From the nature of the accident, though, there is
very likely substantial soft-tissue damage at the least, and for all I know,
something could be broken in the middle of my hand. Either way, not good.
Investigating the underside of the boulder, I can touch the little finger on
my right hand and feel its position with my left hand. It's twisted up inside my
palm, in a partial fist; my muscles seem to be in a state of forced contraction.
I can't relax my hand or extend any of my fingers. I try to wiggle each one
independently. There's no movement whatsoever. I try flexing my muscles to make
a tighter fist, but there isn't even the slightest twitch. Double that on the
"not good."
From Between A Rock and a Hard Place by Aron Ralston, pages 1-30. Copyright © 2004 by Aron Ralston. All rights reserved, no part of this excerpt maybe reproduced without specific permission from the publisher.
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