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A Novel
by Cees Nooteboom
I am here to exorcise a demon; he is here to have sex
with me. Or so I assume. In any case that is what we have
done. A week, he said, not longer. Then he has to go back
to his mob. His mob, his clan that is how they refer to it
here. But he hasnt told me where his mob is. Somewhere
in the outback, somewhere in this countrys endless space.
I have no idea what is going through his mind. Maybe he is
also deceiving me. Can someone lie who scarcely says a word?
He is asleep, and when hes asleep, he is time itself. These
are the oldest people on earth, and they have lived in this
country for at least forty thousand years. You cant get any
closer to eternity than that. I went for a drive one night in
São Paulo and ended up here. Not exactly, but that is how
I think of it. I shouldnt be thinking such things, but no one
can forbid me to think them. I stare at the man asleep beside
me. As young as he is, he looks as though he has lived a
thousand years. He is lying on the ground, curled up like
an animal. When he opens his eyes, he is as old as the rocks,
as old as the lizards you see in the desert, although he wears
his age lightly because he moves lightly, as if he cannot feel
the weight of his body. I tell myself that this is as big a lie
as the other one, but thats not true. I have become involved
in something I have no control over, because my time here
does not count. Every once in a while, when he and I are
out in the desert in a country that consists almost entirely
of desert when he points out things that I have failed to
see, when he all but becomes the land itself and knows where
to find water in places I would never be able to find it, when
I feel humbled in the face of his immeasurable age, which
allows him to see food where I see sand, then I think
against my better judgement that I left my house that
night in order to arrive at this place. I left the heaviness of
the tropics, where all is motion and noise, to arrive at this
stillness.
Lost Paradise © 2004 by Cees Nooteboom, English Translation copyright © 2007 by Susan Massotty, and reprinted with permission of Grove Press, and imprint of Grove/Atlantic, Inc.
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