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A Novel
by Julia Franck
Peter stood at the washbasin and dried himself with the towel:
his shoulders, his stomach, his willy, his feet. If he did it in a
different order, and he hadnt done that for a long time, his mother
lost patience. She had put out a clean pair of trousers and his
best shirt for him. Peter went to the window, tapped the pane
and the seagull flew up. Now that the row of houses opposite
was gone, along with the backs of the buildings and the next
row of houses too, he had a clear view of Königsplatz, where
the ruins of the theatre stood.
Dont be too late home, said his mother, as he was about to
leave the apartment. Last night, she said, a nurse at the hospital
had told her there were going to be special trains laid on today
and tomorrow.Were leaving. Peter nodded, he had been looking
forward for weeks to travelling by train at last.He had only ever
been on a train once, two years ago, when he was starting school
and his father had visited them. His father and he had gone by
train to visit a colleague of his fathers in Velten. Now the war
had been over for eight weeks and his father still didnt come
home. Peter wished he could have asked his mother why she
wasnt waiting for his father any longer, hed have liked her to
confide in him.
Last summer, on the night between the sixteenth and seventeenth
of August, Peter had been alone in the apartment. His
mother often worked two shifts back to back during those
months, and she had stayed on at the hospital after the late shift
to work the night shift as well.When she wasnt there Peter felt
afraid of the hand that would come out from under the bed in
the dark, reaching up through the gap between the wall and the
sheet. He felt the metal of his clasp knife against his leg, he kept
thinking how fast he would have to whip it out when the hand
appeared. That night Peter had lain face down on his mothers
bed and listened, as he did every night. It was better to lie in the
very middle of the bed; that way there was plenty of room on
both sides for him to see the hand appear in good time. Hed
have to thrust the knife in fast and firmly. Peter sweated when
he imagined the hand coming up; he saw himself so paralysed
by fear that he wouldnt be able to raise the clasp knife to
strike it.
The Blindness of the Heart © 2007 by S. Fischer Verlag GmbH; English translation © 2009 by Anthea Bell, reprinted with the permission of the publisher, Grove Atlantic, Inc.
Beliefs are what divide people. Doubt unites them
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