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Joshua became still more anxious, twisting his cap in his hands, biting his lower lip, knocking his knees against each other. "There is ... something else," he said. "This is a matter of shame for me; when I tell you of it, I fear you will come to the wrong conclusion, and call me the fool I say I'm not."
"Speak freely, Joshua: I am a doctor, not a judge. And these walls have overheard more confessions than you can ever know, from patients who contracted their illnesses through sins beyond most men's ability to forgive." John spread his arms in magnanimity. "I promise you: your secrets will remain within this room."
Joshua sat in silence for nearly a full minute, and John thought it wisest to stay silent as well, and wait. Then, with a long, heavy sigh, Joshua said, "Since the ... exclusion ... I have not ... lain with my wife. But I tell you: I am no cuckold, either, and Mary is not one for adulterous intrigues. I know her mind as I know my very own."
John frowned. "Whether or not this is the case—"
"It is not!"
"I believe you. As I intended to say—whether or not this is the case, adultery would not resolve the basic impossibility of what you claim. Though it is true that the lack of adultery makes the situation even more confusing."
"There is ... still more I might reveal," said Joshua, his voice barely above a whisper.
"Friend, you need not parcel out the details of this case in such a parsimonious manner," John replied. "The knowledge only has value after I've received it."
"You may perhaps not find this credible, sir. My wife ... these past few months, she ... talks in her sleep. Mumbling, but also ... curses. The foulest language. I can't bring myself to repeat it. And, a few weeks ago, she began to weep in her slumber. Each night, without fail, I am awakened by her sobs. In the morning I ask her about her troubled sleep, and she remembers nothing."
"It seems that the two of you have failed to put the past behind you," said John. "All of what you describe to me—the illusion of a pregnancy by which you are both convinced; the ceasing of your marital relations; the woman troubled by dark dreams—all this suggests to me that neither of you has brought yourself to accept the unfortunate loss of your child a few months ago. I fear, Joshua, that you and your wife have indulged in a mutual comforting fantasy, in an attempt to recover—"
Joshua leaned forward. "Sir. She weeps not tears, but blood. In the morning I see the evidence on her face: twin tracks of red, leading back from the corners of her eyes to her ears. And spots of blood on our bedding as well."
John Howard stared at Joshua in silent shock.
"For months now," Joshua continued, "I have attempted to turn a blind eye to these details, for they were too bizarre for me to comprehend, and I could only hope that they would somehow vanish just as they came. Her restless sleep; her bloody tears; her complaints of the symptoms of pregnancy, despite the fact that relations between us have grown cold, and her belly has not swollen. But she tells me, this morning, that a child is ready to come, and I believe her. I do not understand what I see, but I can no longer pretend that I do not see it.
"And sir—I am terrified."
Excerpted from Mary Toft; or, The Rabbit Queen by Dexter Palmer. Copyright © 2019 by Dexter Palmer. All rights reserved. No part of this excerpt may be reproduced or reprinted without permission in writing from the publisher.
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