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lani
Heartbreaking
Let me say outright that I love a lot of Nigerian fiction and learning the mores of a culture is infinitely fascinating to me. Adebayo knocked this out of the park for me. I read it in one sitting as I did not want to let go of the characters and the intense pain I felt sympathizing with the main character, Yejide.The characters were so well drawn, defined and vivid. Set in the 1980's through the 2000, we first find Yejide and Akin trying for 4 years to conceive a child without any success. Both were college educated and dismissive of the rules of polygamy that were accepted in their Yoruba culture. However, one day Akin's mother comes to their house with another wife that her husband has already secretly married. Yejide,hurt and desperate, feels she must get pregnant any cost but the cost turns out to be greater than any of them had anticipated. Lies and betrayal provide a common theme intertwined with the demands of traditional culture vs modernity. Along the way we witness the political background of coups and elections which form an undercurrent of unrest to individual daily lives. But it is this marriage, this seemingly wonderful marriage, whose love gets tested and tested that provide the poignancy to this outstanding novel.
Sharalynne P. (Valparaiso, IN)
Stay With Me
I really enjoyed this book and finished it in two days. It was a nice story line, sad but nice. I liked the style of the writing and character development and I didn't mind the chapters being narrated by different people. I really felt like I new them. I will be sharing this book with my book club. Best book I've read in a while.
Debra V. (Kenosha, WI)
Love and infertility in Nigeria
A good novel about a Nigerian couples struggle to love and live in a society that defines and judges a marriage on their ability to have children. The backdrop of the unstable political climate adds to the novel's tension. When I read a book like this it angers me that in so many places women are still not valued or encouraged to make an intellectual or spiritual contribution to society. Perhaps it explains why so many patriarchal countries are badly managed. I would enjoy a book club discussion on the question-- Why do patriarchal cultures value fertility so much?
Dorothy H. (Folsom, CA)
Tale of childlessness and deception
I liked reading about the Yoruba Nigerian Culture and Political unrest from mid 1980 to mid 2000 as an under story to the main characters lives. The story is told from the perspectives of several family members over a 20 year span. It is interesting to see how the culture is blended in with modern life - ie multiple wives, medicine men etc.
I read the book in 2 days.
Mal H. (Mountain House, CA)
Impressive
Instantly pulled in by the emotional turbulence Yejide is dealing with. You feel her pain and heartbreak, betrayal cutting with the sharpest blade. Her plight and pressure upon herself as well as from outsiders is affecting. She is a character stealing your every ounce of sympathy and empathy.
Yejide faces an array of emotions towards her husband. Her adoration tested by lies and betrayal. Finding herself walking a emotional tightrope she never imagined.
Yejide and Akin desire children beyond measure. The narrative alternates perspectives demonstrating the strain and leaps each will take to forge a family. Akin stretches your imagination, uncomfortable decisions and choices made in desperation and want.
The story unravels slowly with precision possessing incredibly strong punctuated twists. The rawness of this marriage garners your interest with the turn of every page.
Nigeria's 1980's political turbulence sets the backdrop for this evocative and emotionally rousing glimpse of a couple facing challenges conceiving as well as cultural and familia pressure in regards to this easily assumed expectation and obligation.
Sue N
Hit and Miss
I started reading this book expecting to enjoy it, having read a glowing review. The setting of the book in Nigeria appealed to me—I haven't read any books by Nigerian authors and looked forward to learning more about Nigerian culture and society. In that regard, the book met my expectations. But in several other ways, the book did not live up to my expectations. Although I didn't mind the alternating voices in different chapters, it wasn't always immediately clear whose voice it was. And early on I was interested in the two main characters, but as the book went on they both became somewhat flat and clichéd. Finally, as the plot unfolded, it struck me more and more as something of a soap opera.
Linda L. (Pickerington, OH)
Story of love and loss set in Nigeria
Set in Africa, this is the story of a marriage struggling to survive against the most heart breaking losses. The social mores of Nigerian culture toward infertility, polygamy and childbirth create a very troubled marriage for Yejide and Akin. Yejide shows such strength against the most unbelievable losses. Husband and wife share their viewpoints in alternating chapters. Nigerian phrases and terms are sprinkled generously throughout the book along with tales from African folklore. I applaud this very ambitious first novel by Adebayo. If you enjoy learning about other cultures, you will like Stay with Me. I wish I could have given Stay with Me five stars, but I struggled to fully empathize with some of the characters.
Susan B. (Rutledge, MO)
Interesting in some ways; wanted to like it more than I did
This was fairly well written, and included interesting details of a society and culture I am not familiar with. Most intriguing to me was the sense of what it might be like living in a politically unstable country under military rule. Remarks about elections and continued lack of results were powerful in their understated-ness. Generally, though, I wanted to like this book much more than I actually did. I got the sense that I was missing a lot due to not being familiar with the culture. I did not enjoy reading about or relate to the intense pressure to have a child, the patriarchal aspects of the culture, or (what looked to me like) a great deal of lying and cruelty. Family seemed to be all-important, but the caring for its members did not seem genuine, done for show rather than actually caring. Perhaps if I understood the culture better I would have enjoyed the book more.