What do readers think of Motherhood So White by Nefertiti Austin? Write your own review.

Motherhood So White was an interesting read, particularly as a white woman. I looked forward to reading it because I want to learn. It did teach me quite a bit about the different aspects of family life in the black community. I find that I was anticipating something of a reference book for black women looking to raise adopted children. I wanted to understand the challenges in a society that still is not as socially just as we would like. Alas, it was not a reference book but rather exactly what the title says “a memoir”. The author’s frustrations were really a core message in this book. I was pleased when she embarked upon the challenge of advocating not only for herself and her children but for future adoptive parents. The book chronicled her own growth as her children grew and that was very nice to be able to witness. She did a great job with descriptions both of the characters that formed her life and of her struggles throughout the foster/adoption process.

Nefertiti's story of Motherhood through the eyes of an African American single woman was heartfelt and eye opening. I developed a deep respect for her and her commitment to working against a difficult system in an ever increasing racist world. I can only imagine the goodness her story and her life will bring to her adoptive children and her surrounding community. Her work will go a long way to fill the void helping others to have more knowledge and also break down negative stereotypes that are so prevalent . I look forward to hearing more from Ms. Austin.

With clarity and courage, Neffertiti Austin, shares her journey from single, educated, independent Black woman to adoptive motherhood. Her goal to raise a black boy in a secure and steady home germinated from being raised by her grandparents following her parent's separation. The decision to legally adopt from outside her community drew strong disapproval from her family. Neffertiti's memoir provides an informative and emotional guide for women who follow her path. Her successful creation of a loving home sets the bar high for all adoptive mothers.

Reading this book makes one aware we cannot live in someone else's skin. My history, background and family is so different from Austin's that it seems it's almost impossible to understand her. She does, however, make it possible, and a reader can grow in empathy and understanding. The author is a single African American woman who analyzes and writes about her life and what about that life that lead her to adopt a black son. I'm not sure that Motherhood So White is a good title for this book. I thought the book's purpose was to encourage black women to adopt black sons. I thought her son was blessed by her decision.

I was excited to receive this book to review. Since I live in a very diverse suburban area, with many neighbors, friends, and former co-workers of different racial and ethnic backgrounds, I wanted to read about how black mothers would differ from white or other mothers.

There is much to admire in Ms. Austin's memoir. She overcame a difficult childhood to become an excellent and loving mother to her two adopted children. She is herself educated, thoughtful, and involved in efforts to promote adoption among black families. Her worries about her children's safety and acceptance in society, and their future opportunities, are explained in detail and are often disturbing to read.

What does concern me and makes me worry is that she expresses a lot of distrust for white people, even implying that all white people are deliberately holding black people down. She also communicates this distrust of whites to her children. I understand that she feels justified in taking these precautions. Not until the end of the book does she mention that she has some white friends. Most of her experiences in motherhood and her children's education discuss being involved only with black acquaintances, friends and family.

Her theory that motherhood in America is somehow reserved for white women is not convincing to me. I am in my early '70's and remember when black faces began to be seen on TV, in magazines, and in all media in general. Before the mid-1960's, I lived in the south, where black and white people moved in very different circles. That changed for the better after Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr., and our country is much improved because of him and the civil rights movement. It is unfortunate that in the present political climate, some of those advances in race relations are now suffering, but I have hope that people of good will toward others will predominate again.

I was left at the end of the book feeling sad that if I met Ms. Austin, she would feel unease or even anger toward me because of my white skin. I would not feel that way at all toward her or her children.

Two weeks ago I adopted a little boy from the foster care system after a 3 1/2 year rollercoaster ride. On one hand the book was very relatable, family visits, siblings, judgement as a single woman adopting a son. How and when do you teach a boy to pee standing up?!! On the other hand I had no idea what extra hurdles I would have had to jump through if I weren't white. The point of the book in a nutshell! I have so much respect for the author, not only for taking these beautiful children, into her home but for opening a dialogue on the experience of adopting as a single black woman. My heart breaks for all of the hard "lessons" she has to teach her children about being black in America. Something my little blue eyed blond haired boy will never deal with.
Not all babies in the foster care system are "crack babies" my son is not "lucky" or blessed to be in my home. He is my son as much as the child I gave birth to. I am not a saint or a superhero, nor am I getting rich or in it for the money. It is not an easy ride but parenthood never is. That's what we are at the end of the day "PARENT" no matter how we got there. We need to lift one another up without judgement. We're doing the best that we can, it takes a village.

Parts of this book were unique and engaging. There were other parts that felt well tread and the author did not offer much new. It is a great primer on the fears and hopes of mother's and how racism amplified those experiences.

I read this book by Nefertiti Austin hoping to gain deeper insights into the challenges and difficulties in raising an adopted child by a single black woman. The book did not do that. It was readable enough and the author wrote truthfully about her background, I felt, but it was not an interesting read that spurred me on to learn or know more by turning the pages. Adopting a "crack baby" and raising the child to the best of one's ability is not unusual in the black community or even the while community as a whole these days. People in all circumstances raise to occasions as they present themselves. Ms. Austin does portray her love for her adopted child in her writing and that may be the prime redeeming quality I found in reading this book.