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Book Summary and Reviews of One Day I'll Grow Up and Be a Beautiful Woman by Abi Maxwell

One Day I'll Grow Up and Be a Beautiful Woman by Abi Maxwell

One Day I'll Grow Up and Be a Beautiful Woman

A Mother's Story

by Abi Maxwell

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  • Sep 2024, 320 pages
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About this book

Book Summary

A fiery, heartbreaking, riveting memoir that follows one New Hampshire family over the course of three years, unspooling a story of gender identity, class, trans youth, and a child caught in the riptide of America's culture wars.

Abi Maxwell grew up in rural New Hampshire, one of eight kids in a poor town abutting a wealthier lakeside village. As a young couple, Maxwell and her husband planned not to have kids, but when Maxwell became pregnant, she knew she wanted to raise her child near the mountains and lake of her youth. When her six-year-old, who was known to the world as a boy, asks to wear pink sneakers, asks to be a witch for Halloween, asks to wear a girl's dance costume, Abi worries about how their small community will react. But when that child changes her name, grows her hair long, and announces that she is a girl, a firestorm engulfs the family.

Weaving together the story of her own youth, marked by long afternoons skiing the mountains, a cottage on the lake, and a proud gay brother, but also by neglect and bullying that pushed her brother to the brink, Abi Maxwell contends with the rural America where she was raised and, years later, where she is now raising her daughter, as lawmakers nationwide push to erase the very existence of trans youth. Intimate and stirring, this book is essential reading for this moment in our history.

Please be aware that this discussion guide will contain spoilers!
  1. Small-town Yankees are notoriously suspicious of outsiders. Despite the Maxwell family's deep roots in Gilford, New Hampshire, they are made to feel like others. How does this betrayal of "one of their own" affect your perception of Gilford's residents? Of small towns in general? Of the Maxwell family?
  2. Abi's brother Noah, although absent, is a central character in this book. How do his experiences inform Greta's story? How do they affect Abi's reactions to the town's bigotry?
  3. Abi's mother reacts poorly to her granddaughter at first, but she changes her behavior in a matter of months. What do you think changed her attitude?
  4. Dr. Rudine Sims Bishop of Ohio State University famously described libraries as providing ...
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Reviews

Media Reviews

"Maxwell's stunning candor and brisk prose make her family's struggles feel heart-wrenchingly immediate. This is required reading." —Publishers Weekly (starred review)

"In an affecting memoir, novelist Maxwell recounts years of frustration, rage, and sadness as she and her husband fought for support—from schools, neighbors, and the community—for their transgender child." —Kirkus Reviews

"Stirring and fierce, righteous and right, One Day I'll Grow Up and Be a Beautiful Woman is powerfully written, elegantly constructed, and unfailingly wise. Abi Maxwell's memoir is equal parts furious and hopeful, outrageous and familiar, harrowing and heartening, timely and timeless. It is a story that pits a small town and the small minds who dominate it against the powers of mother love, familial support, and an inspiring refusal to give up or give in." —Laurie Frankel, New York Times bestselling author of This Is How It Always Is

"One Day I'll Grow Up and Be a Beautiful Woman is an extraordinary story about love, selfhood, and belonging, and what parents will do to protect their child in a place that is unwilling to protect her. The answer, of course, is anything and everything, forever. There are so many families who need the righteous fury, compassion, and hope they'll find in this book." —Maggie Smith, New York Times bestselling author of You Could Make This Place Beautiful

"This book is a compelling and visceral portrayal of a mother's pain, joy, hope, and heartbreak as she fights for her daughter's right to safely be herself. As a parent of a transgender child and as an advocate, I am deeply grateful for Abi Maxwell's vulnerability and honesty in sharing what too many families across the country are facing in these turbulent times. I can only hope readers allow themselves to be transformed by the humanity laid bare in these pages for the sake of generations to come." —Jamie Bruesehoff, author of Raising Kids Beyond the Binary

This information about One Day I'll Grow Up and Be a Beautiful Woman was first featured in "The BookBrowse Review" - BookBrowse's membership magazine, and in our weekly "Publishing This Week" newsletter. Publication information is for the USA, and (unless stated otherwise) represents the first print edition. The reviews are necessarily limited to those that were available to us ahead of publication. If you are the publisher or author and feel that they do not properly reflect the range of media opinion now available, send us a message with the mainstream reviews that you would like to see added.

Any "Author Information" displayed below reflects the author's biography at the time this particular book was published.

Reader Reviews

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Bonnie G

Necessary and urgent memoir
Abi Maxwell's memoir tells of the heartbreaking experiences of her family in a small town in New Hampshire who were vilified and and ostracized when her daughter transitioned socially to her new name, new pronouns and new identity at a very young age. Maxwell's language is poetic and heart rending, as she takes us through the years leading up to Greta's new identity and the aftermath. Maxell allows us to understand completely what is means to fight your child at all costs and the toll it takes on a parent mentally and physically to constantly keep the monsters at bay. Highly recommended for readers of memoirs relating to parenting, strong women, transgender equality, and American politics.

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Author Information

Abi Maxwell

Abi Maxwell is the author of the novels Lake People and The Den. After graduating from the writing program at the University of Montana, she spent many years working in public libraries, and she now works as a high school librarian. She is a dedicated advocate for the rights of transgender youth in her state and frequently testifies in front of the legislature on their behalf.

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